Free Printable Behavior Charts.com

Behavior Charts
*

Behavior Charts Ages 3+

*

Behavior Charts Ages 11+

*

Single Behavior Charts 

 Ages 3-10

 (to target one behavior)

*  Behavior Contracts
*

Chore Charts Ages 4-10

*  Chore Charts Ages 11+
*

 Step-by-Step Charts

 (each space is a step

 toward better behavior!)

*  Goal Setting Charts
*  Potty Training Charts
*  Pet Care Charts
*  Teeth Care Charts
*  Hygiene Charts
*

 Homework/School Charts

*

 Reading Charts

*

 Charts To Target

 Specific Behaviors

*  Day Care Charts
*  Exercise Charts
*  Saving Money Charts
*  Conflict Resolution
*  Anxiety
*

 Anger Management

*  Healthy Eating Charts
*  Daily Routine Charts
*

 Instrument Practice

 Charts

*  Holiday Charts
*

 Color By Number

 Behavior Charts

*  Feeling Charts
*  Example Behavior Charts
* Medical Reward Charts   and Certificates
* Picture Cards
*

 Behavior Charts For

 Teachers

Reward Coupons, Stickers, and Other Printables
* Behavior Bucks
* Reward Coupons

*

Reward Certificates

*

Reward Certificates for the Classroom

*

Potty Training Reward

Coupons

* "Caught You" Coupons

*

Printable Invitations & Cards

* Printable Stickers
* Charts For the Home

*

Summer Schedules & Charts

*

Printable Calendar Pages for Kids

* Printable Gift Labels
Articles of Interest
Behavior Management
Using Behavior Charts
Reward Ideas
Consequences For Young Kids & Toddlers
When To Negotiate With Kids
Bedtime Arguments And Homework
Regain Parental Control
Dealing With Defiant Young Kids and Toddlers
Using Natural Consequences
Summer Break Strategies
Create Accountability During Summer Break
Gaining Respect From Kids
Parenting Angry Teens
When Good Kids Misbehave
When Kids Only Act Out At Home
When No Means No
Start Parenting More Effectively
When Kids Ignore Consequences
When Your Kids Ingnore You
Giving Effective Time-Outs
Dealing With Power Struggles Part 1
Avoiding Power Struggles Part 2
Setting Limits With Difficult Kids
How To Stop A Fight
Oppositional Defiant Disorder
Manipulative Behavior
Keep Your Summer Break Peaceful
Summer Survival For Parents
Disciplining Your Two Year Old
How To Stop Kids From Cursing
Inappropriate Soiling
Consequences For Teens
The Truth About Bullies
Stopping A Temper Tantrum

Potty Training

School

Classroom Management

Classroom Management Strategies

First Year Survival

Stop Bullying In Your Classroom

Controlling The Uncontrollable Class

Child Development

Birth to Age Five

Six to Eleven

Preteens & Teens

Importance Of Play In Child Development

Chores

Sleep

ADHD/ADD

Tips For Parenting ADHD and  Spirited Kids

Unlocking The Secrets To Good Behavior

Summer Planning For A Child With ADHD

Stress Management

Stress Management Tips

Stress-Guarding Your Family

Managing Holiday Stress

Preventing Parental Burnout

How To Be A Calm Parent

Alternative Families

General Parenting/Family 

Top 5 Parenting Mistakes
Parenting The Child You Have
Gaining Respect From Kids
Spending Money On Kids
Fix Your Morning Routine
Perfect Parents Dont Exist
How To Interview A Nanny
When Good Parents Have Difficult Children
Parenting Gifted Children
New Year's Resolutions For Parents
Deciding Appropriate Parenting Rules
Is Your Child A Know-it-all?
Successful Goal Setting
Walking Away From A Fight With Your Child
Creating Accountability In Your Home
Good Cop Bad Cop Parenting
Help Transition Your Kids Through Divorce
Parenting Picky Eaters
When Toddlers Are Picky Eaters
Help Kids Cope With Pet Loss
Great Book Series For Kids
What You Shouldn't Say To Your Kids

Keep Cool When Kids Push Your Buttons

Parenting Your Teen
Helping Kids Adjust To The New Baby
Summer Structure For Kids
Teaching Kids How To Save Money
Selecting The Right Pet
75 Ways To Say Good Job
Getting Kids To Love Reading

Why Boredom Is Good For Kids
Getting Along With Your Preteen
Bedwetting Solutions
Summer Job Ideas For Teens
Halloween Safety Tips
Halloween Party Snack Ideas
Autism/Sensory Disorders/Anxiety
Tips To Tackle Tricky Behaviors
 

 

 

 

 

"F--- You, Mom!" How to Stop Your Child
from Cursing in Your Home


  

 

Don't pick up that bar of soap yet! James Lehman, MSW has great advice for parents on what to do when their child has a foul mouth, from generalized cursing to verbal abuse.

You: "Why didn't you do your homework?"
Your child: "I hate f------ school. I hate my f------ teacher."
You: "Don't talk to me like that!"
Your child: "Why not? You swear, too."

 

Stop this scene right here.

Your child is attempting to get you into a fight. When your child curses, above all, do not get into a power struggle over it with them. Parents should ignore the invitation to argue at this point and say, "We're not talking about anything else. Why didn't you do your homework" That's my question. And you're not going to use your cell phone until your homework is done." Then turn around and walk away. Don't debate it, don't get into arguments. If your child says "I don't care," you can say, "OK. If you don't care, that's all right. But you're not using your cell until you get your homework done." Don't keep it going. Later, when your child calms down, give them a consequence for swearing. Each family should have a routine way of differentiating swearing from verbal abuse, and a different system for dealing with each behavior.

Let me be clear: If your child curses at you, what you need to understand is that they're trying to hurt you, throw you off balance, or suck you into a fight. I believe that families should have clear rules about cursing. There shouldn't be any discussion about it when it happens. And in my mind, there's a difference between kids cursing in general or cursing at you or another family member, and calling you rude names. But either way, families need to establish rules around it. Often kids curse because they're frustrated or angry about being asked to do something that's hard for them or that they find boring, or maybe they'd rather be playing video games or hanging out with their friends. Understand that this is a way of solving the problem of being frustrated, but in a very immature way. In these instances, when things calm down, kids need to be taught that cursing doesn't solve their problems-it adds to it. Because not only do they have their original problem, now they've got an extra consequence on top of that, whether they lose some of their allowance or they forfeit some video game time.

There's No Excuse for Verbal Abuse


Parents need to establish a zero tolerance policy for verbal abuse in the home. Verbal abuse is differentiated from cursing because it is an attack on a person. Cursing is using an expletive when describing a situation or their own frustration. So in the opening example, that's cursing: "I hate my f------ teacher." If the child had said, "F--- you, Mom, it's none of your business," that's verbal abuse. And there's no excuse for abuse of any kind. When kids curse at their parents and siblings and call them names using sexualized terms, when this kind of attacking name-calling happens, this is verbal abuse, not just swearing. It is damaging, not just obnoxious. It has to be dealt with in the same way you'd deal with any kind of abusive behavior. When a child says, "You whore," or "You faggot," that's damaging to your other children, and you're responsible for protecting them from that kind of attack.

Make no bones about it: this behavior needs to be dealt with very strongly

If your child is grounded for 24 hours as part of the consequence and he happens to be involved in sports, make him miss practice for a day as part of the consequence of his actions. Don't let anybody manipulate you by saying they ?need to be there.? The most important thing here is that kids understand that there's no excuse for abuse. I promise you as a parent, missing one day of practice is not the end of the world. What's more important is not letting your child call you or his siblings those foul, foul names. If your child is not involved in sports, then have him lose his electronics for a few days. The best way to handle that is by saying, ?You can't have your phone back until you don't call your sister those names for 24 hours.? If your child calls his sister a foul name again six hours later, it becomes 48 hours without the phone. And he has to go to his room and write a letter of apology. By the way, when I say letter, I mean a brief paragraph. And what the letter has to say is, "This is what I'll do differently the next time I want to call you a name." It should include an apology, but also, more importantly, he should make a commitment not to do it again.

For Younger Children


I believe it's helpful if you don't curse in front of your children if you expect your children not to curse in front of you. One thing we see very early on is that kids mimic parents by saying words they don't understand. In that case, the best thing a parent can do with their younger children is calmly and pleasantly correct them, and try to teach them that what they've said is a bad word. The way I say it is, "It's a bad word because people don't like that word." If your child says, "but you use that word," you can say, "You tell me "no" when I say it. Tell Mommy, too. Remind me that it's a bad word." And when they remind you, say you're sorry and use a different word.

Establish a "No Swearing" Rule and Make Everyone Pay the Consequences


For children who are older, an effective thing you can do as a family to curtail swearing is to establish a "Cursing Jar". If anyone in your family curses, they have to put a quarter into the jar. If money isn't readily available, a checkmark can go next to your child's name, and every check might equal 10 minutes of an extra task or chore. Doing their regular chores shouldn't be a consequence; you should give your child extra things to do. Look at it this way: if you make your child do the dishes because he cursed, and then you ask him to do them again on Thursday night, he's going to ask, "Why? I didn't do anything wrong." He'll feel like he's being punished when all you want is for him to do his normal chores around the house. So it's an extra chore you want to add on. I think the sooner you give them the consequence after they've cursed the better.

It's also very effective to have an age-appropriate schedule and structure at night that lists how much time your kids can spend on video games, the computer, and watching TV. Say for example your child has an hour free time to play video games, but the way he gets that hour is by doing his homework first. If he curses, that extra chore you give him is done during that hour, and he loses part or all of his free time. That system should be in place, so later on when your child calms down and wants to deal with the issue because she wants her cell phone back, you can say, "You know the consequences for cursing and name-calling." And they should get a different checkmark or extra chore for every time they curse.

What about Kids Who Swear at You under Their Breath?


Some kids swear passive aggressively, under their breath. But let's face it, even if it's under their breath, it's the same thing, and you should give your child consequences for it. They may say, "I didn't say anything. That's not fair!"

You can come back with, "I'm sorry, but that's what I heard you say. In the future, speak more loudly, or there will be consequences." In other words, don't let muttering curse words under his breath become a way for him to manipulate so that he doesn't have to develop self-control.

Swearing is an issue at some time in all families. It's one of the ways that frustration and anger are verbalized in our culture. Nonetheless, parents have to work very diligently on watching their language and being role models for their children, as well as holding their children accountable. Disrespect for authority is a major problem affecting children and adults today. It's important to realize that children who know how to act respectfully and speak respectfully are better equipped to deal with the adult world than those who prefer to sound like thugs. (F---You Mom: How To Stop Your Child From Cursing In Your Home
reprinted with permission from Empowering Parents)

by James Lehman, MSW


About the Author:       

For three decades, behavioral therapist James Lehman, MSW, has worked with troubled teens and children with behavior problems. He has developed a practical, real-life approach to managing children and adolescents that teaches them how to solve social problems without hiding behind defiant, disrespectful, or obnoxious behavior. He has taught his approach to parents, teachers, state agencies and treatment centers in private practice and now through The Total Transformation -- a comprehensive step-by-step, multi-media program that makes learning James' techniques remarkably easy and helps you change your child's behavior.  Check out a free offer!  www.TheTotalTransformation.com

 

 

 

   

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Fix Your Child's Attitude
Simple, step-by-step program will turn your kid around.
TheTotalTransformation.com

Home   I    About Us   I   Contact Us  I    Privacy Policy   Advertise l  Article Submissions

Copyright 2007-2014 Free Printable Behavior Charts. Com. All Rights Reserved.