Parenting Questions Answered Online, Free Behavior Charts

Questions & Answers is a new section here on our site. Our question submission form is on our home page. We are eager to hear from you! As our readers submit questions regarding behavior charts, parenting or tackling tricky behaviors, we will have have them available on this page for you to read. We can all learn a thing or two from each other!

(Disclaimer: The information on freeprintablebehaviorcharts.com is for educational purposes only and should not be considered to be medical advice. It is not meant to replace the advice of a health care provider. All advice and information should be considered to be incomplete without a visit to your health care provider.)

Managing the behavior of a child who has ADHD

My son is a really bright kid. Loves being helpful and has gotten better at school
since last year. Our problems remain during unstructured times, meeting new kids and our babysitter. He has threatened our babysitter by lifting up his fist or a toy of
some sort. If he sees kids playing with a ball and wants to join in, he tries to
steal the ball or growls at them. One boy got so mad one time, he tried to drown my
son in the pool. He was diagnosed with ADHD, but has been off medication for over ayear. I love my son, he is still my baby boy and I may not be strict enough with
him. But, I am at a loss with his behavior. He cannot be kicked out of another camp.
Please help!!!
-Suzanne, Ohio

Suzanne,

Without a couple pieces of information, your situation is a bit tough to address. First, how old is your son? Next, what was the reason he went off his medication? If the medication was helping your son with his impulsive behavior, it may be wise to meet with a mental health professional to discuss medication options. A trained mental health professional who can also prescribe medication is the best option as she can provide support and counseling as well. That would be the first recommendation.

Glad to hear that things are going better at school. As you’ve pointed out, your son does better in a structured environment and school provides that structure. You definitely want a babysitter who can manage your child’s behavior effectively. Make sure that your son and the babysitter have many structured activities planned. You may have to make up a small schedule to structure every minute of their time. For instance, 3-4pm go to the park and ride bikes, 4-5pm come home and play a board game, 5-6pm eat dinner and clean the dishes, 6-8pm watch a movie, 8-8:30pm get ready for bed and go to bed. If you have the time structured, then you can make an incentive chart for your son that matches the activities he will do with the babysitter. Your babysitter can give him a sticker on the chart when he leaves the park nicely, plays the game appropriately, eats dinner and helps clean up, gets ready for bed and goes to bed on time. It’s a bit of work for you, but structure sounds effective for him. And he will know that if he puts his fist up at the babysitter, he won’t get a sticker for that activity. For instance, if she asks him to get his pajamas on, and he puts his fist up, he doesn’t get a sticker for going to bed nicely. Have a fun reward set up if he gets most of his stickers. Rewards that work well are activities with a special person like going out for pizza, going out for ice cream, going to the park or a movie, etc.

In addition, you may have to have a chart set up for him at camp. Unfortunately, individuals who love kids but don’t always have good child management skills staff many summer camps. And, there is often some unstructured free time during longer camps. This is the time your boy may struggle with his behavior. First, try to arrange for him to participate in camps that are as structured as possible. Meet with camp directors and staff to make sure you know the management style and consequences set up for kids. Make sure that the time is very structured for your boy. And, you can have a chart set up for him that allows him to earn a reward on a daily basis if he follows the camp rules and behaves appropriately.

Finally, as a parent, you are going to have to put some extra time and effort into research and planning before leaving your child with a babysitter or in a camp. Your extra efforts will indeed pay off when you see his behavior improve. But, most importantly, you should find support in the form of a child and family counselor. It’s not easy managing a child with special needs and a counselor can provide parenting support, tips, and even help you make up those charts in addition to assessing your child for medication. Also, you may want to check out our article entitled, Tips For Parenting ADHD and Spirited Kids.
Best of luck!

How To Stop Whining Behavior

How do I get my son to stop whining or at least slow down ? -Brian & Joanne, Canada

Joanne & Brian,

Whining is a successful strategy for kids when they are rewarded for their efforts. The first question to ask yourself is, “Does my son get what he wants when he whines?” You might want to keep a written record of the events surrounding his whining so you know how to better tackle the problem. Take note of when he is whining, why he is whining, and what happens as a result of his whining. Ask yourself some questions. Is his whining brought on by hunger or exhaustion? Does his whining happen at the same time every day? How do we act when he whines? What rewards does he get by whining?

Whining can begin when a child is sleepy or hungry. If that is the case, take some preventative measures to make sure that your son’s needs are met before the whining begins. Does he need to eat a small snack between meals or go to bed earlier? Ask yourself these questions if you think that his whining is tied in with basic needs.

Whining can also be an attempt to get attention. Have you been busier than usual? Does your son need some extra attention right now? Have there been any changes in the family that would cause him to feel left out? If this is the case, make some special one on one time for a favorite activity. When kids feel that they need attention, they will get it anyway they can…negatively or positively!

Next, take a look at your own behavior. When your son whines, how do you handle it? Do you calmly state your expectations or do you become drawn into the moment and argue with your son? Many kids learn whining from their parents. That’s right. We often whine back and reply with statements like, “Stop whining…I hate it when you whine!” Then, we may give in to our kid’s demands just to stop the awful whining behavior. If you feel like you are drawn into the whining behavior, you need to work on your response to your child. Keep the tone of your voice calm and your expectations clear and to the point. In reality, your child may have a reasonable request. The problem is the way in which he is addressing you. So, you might say something like, “Why don’t you go to your room and practice asking without whining. Then you can come back and try again.” The point is to let your child know that you won’t address his needs when he asks in a whining tone of voice. If your son is pretty young, lets say age 4-6, then you might repeat his request back to him in a calm voice and prompt him with, “Let’s try that again without whining.”

Most importantly, realize that changing behavior takes time. Be patient and calm when dealing with your son. Don’t forget to catch him being good. Sometimes, rewarding a child's positive behavior will be enough to make change happen. Give him positive feedback when he uses words without whining. You might say, “Boy, I like how you asked for that without whining!” Take a look at our page on 75 Ways to Say Good Job. Best of luck!!

When Behavior Charts Don't Seem To Work

Behavior charts don't seem to work for my daughter. She gets more upset when she doesn't get her "sticker". Should I stop using them?
-Laurie, Kansas

First, you might want to reevaluate your chart. Are your expectations too high? Can your daughter be successful with the chart you set up? Did your daughter help you pick the rewards? Will the rewards motivate her? These are all important questions you need to ask when setting up your behavior chart. Setting up a
chart takes time and a bit of readjustment now and then. Take a look at our page on Using Behavior Charts.

If you decide that a chart just isn't working, that's o.k. Charts aren't the best method for all kids. Continue to be positive, and give your daughter
encouragement for at least trying the chart. Try to complete the week you set up to model consistency for her. Then, try some other options. Maybe you can go back to a behavior chart at a later time. Maybe not. The most important thing
is to stay positive.

When Do I Stop The Chart?

My son really likes the rewards of his behavior chart, but his behavior has already gotten better. When do I end the chart?
Helen, Ohio

It's great that your son had a positive experience with his behavior chart! When your child's target behavior is achieved, you can stop the chart. Finish out the chart for the week. And, even though you see your child demonstrating the target behavior, use the chart another week or two to reinforce the behavior and give your child some time to practice. Then, you can stop. Let him know what a great job he did on the chart, and if he enjoys it, start working on another behavior.

Can You Give Me A Free Reward Chart For My Kids?

Amy, England

Amy, you are free to print off any of our charts and printables right from our website. They are free of charge. If you run into any problems printing, drop us an email and we'll try to help you work it out!

How To Help A Child Who Enjoys Being A Troublemaker

I'm working with a child who says he "enjoys" being a "troublemaker!" but that he
wants to improve his behavior (he really is sweet-spirited, he just needs some
direction). He loves attention, loves to talk out of turn in school because he
feels class is boring - he's a 4th grader. Any ideas of what might help him realize
that being a "troublemaker" isn't positive attention-getting!? :) Thanks!

Jennifer, NC

Jennifer,

First of all, you might want to consider an academic evaluation. If he is truly bored, he may qualify for gifted services. This all depends on his teacher's recommendation and how he is performing academically. He may need some additional challenges in the classroom to keep him busy. Set up some activities that he can do when his work is completed like reading, drawing, or working on a classroom computer.

You might also examine how the teacher is handling classroom management. Are there consequences for talking out of turn or distracting other students? Is the class as a whole well behaved or does the classroom feel chaotic? The teacher may need to improve behavior management techniques for the whole class.

Perhaps the teacher/parent/school counselor can work together to set up an incentive chart. Maybe he can earn a special lunch with a school staff person or a treat from a treasure box for good behavior. Another idea is to have positive behavior coupons that his teacher can hand out randomly during the day to recognize any positive behavior that he exhibits. These can be small bits of paper with "great job" written on them...something easy. Every time a school staff person notices that he does something positive, give him a coupon.

Ultimately, the way to help a child realize that his troublemaking behavior is not going to get him positive attention is to reward his positive behavior. The more we reward and recognize a child's positive behavior, the more they seek that reward by repeating the behavior.

Finally, if change doesn't happen at school, then there may be problems at home that are interfering. Attention getting behavior at school may be a signal that he is not getting the attention he needs at home. Many kids would rather get negative attention than no attention at all. In order to address this possibility and assess the family dynamics, a trained counselor needs to meet with the family to explore what is going on at home. Best of luck!

Home I About Us I Contact Us I Link Exchange l Privacy Policy